Before we get to the thick of it, I wanted to share my new favorite breakfast combo. Yesterday was November 1 which to me, is officially the start of Holiday Season. If you are the Grinch, you’re going to hate me, because I am already plotting my Christmas crafts, recipes and gifts. Anywho, I am currently loving this cinnamon raison bread from Sunmaid toasted and topped with pumpkin butter. Enjoyed alongside my new Pumpkin Pie Spice coffee I picked up at Target – I am in love.
You can find the recipe for that pumpkin butter here - and if you start with pumpkin puree it would be super fast and easy to make!
So now, more to the point.
It seems like everytime I turn around I am needing to come up with a new routine. I’m going to give you a breakdown of life over the past few months. Yesterday I wrote about writing goals so you could reflect back on how far you’ve come. I also think it’s important to reflect back on life in general, pausing a moment. Our life has been a whirlwind over the last 5 years, but the last year has been an even stronger hurricane. Good things, but still. Sometimes its nice to go back and review – it makes me feel better. That the nagging “out of control” feeling just beyond my level of consciousness is there for a reason. That I’m not crazy. So here goes.
Being pregnant brings about a host of changes, sleep patterns, how you eat, events you can no longer go to…. then you have the little one and everything changes again. Life practically slows down to a stop everytime you hold that little person – sure life spins on out of control beyond you, but for you, life is still. Your husband might come home confused at the mountain of laundry, the unwashed dishes, the dinner still uncooked and marvel that you didn’t have enough time. But us moms, we know. Somehow that time just seeps out of the day when you’re cuddled up with that newborn baby… and we’re just fine with it.
That lasted a whopping 2 weeks for me. Then it was back to the office to tackle the unsurmountable-by-anyone-but-me issues of a printer out of ink, a fax out of paper, a server that was perpetually down. Apparently a 7 year professional degree cannot teach you these things…
That went on for another two weeks before I was back to work full time.
That lasted one day before we got the call about moving to Utah.
The next month was spent working full time, TRYING to be a mom of two, and desperately trying to hold together my sanity – searching for a house, flying out to Utah, looking for a job here, all that stuff…. AND letting my body heal.
Exactly forty-two days later, we hit the road and left our life in Seattle for our new home in Utah. We left behind every single person we knew and loved, all of our family, our friends, the places that we had created our lives around. Everything familiar.
Four days later I did some training at my new job and within two weeks of that, I had both kids in full time care and I was working again.
That was less than two months ago.
Last Wednesday, I posted about being in a funk. After looking back at the past year, I’d say that funk was deserved. I honestly don’t know how Nick carries on…
As most of you know, I am now working from home. Tomorrow will mark my first full week of doing so. It’s nice having Spencer be home with me. But, it’s just another routine change. Waking up, juggling work and a baby, SHOWERING, getting in a workout. I thought this would be easier. And maybe it is. I just haven’t figured it out yet. For now, it seems I barely wake up myself before that little one is ready to be up and active. And once he is, I don’t want to just prop him up on the couch while I work away. So…. this is a new balancing act and I still need my hand held on the beam for fear of falling off.
I’ll figure it out. Us moms, that’s what we do. And we’ll continue figuring it out until these kids move out into their own lives. But guess what? Then we’ll have the new routine once more. Life is a journey, it’s not a static state.
So yes, pause and reflect but also, remember to enjoy it. Enjoy the quiet when its there, the craziness, and those chaotic moments too. Pretty soon, even that will come to a close…
The big lesson for me is to get over it. I get down on myself for not having this whole thing figured out. That I should be better at this, that I should get more done in a day… Truth is, I’m doing the best I can and that’s enough.
Here’s a look at my current working conditions.
My mother-in-law bought me this little “ETC” bin a while back – bet she didn’t think I’d be using it as a file stand.
So my desk space is a little sad and sparse. But check out the view:
Yep, I was up working before the sun had fully risen. I told you I’m still figuring this new routine out! Give me a break