A Fight with Ourselves

If the amount of rain we have had in the last two days is any indication of the snowfall we will get this year…I would like a ticket out of this place immediately. I love the snow and I love playing in the snow, taking the kids out for sledding and all that stuff. I love the snow because it is a once in a while thing that you hope and pray for as a kid so that you get a snow day. I love it because taking a trip up to the mountains and playing in the snow is the perfect beginning to lifelong memories.

But snow that comes on Halloween and lasts until March – this is not the same elusive snow that I prayed for as a child. This is not the snow that makes me happy inside. No, this is snow that strikes terror into my heart as I think of all the outdoor activities I love and will have to be put on hold until the ground shows itself again mid-spring.

I love the rain but its foreboding of the snow to follow (which is in the forecast for later this week) has me feeling more than a little bummed.

What about you? Are you snow angels or would you rather it came and then went just as quickly?

I wanted to tell you a story about running last week. I alluded to this in yesterday’s post when I admitted that we missed Thursday’s run and had to make it up on Friday. The full story is that I started feeling a bit sick on Wednesday and when Thursday came around I was really not feeling well. I had an important meeting at work and that is the only reason I didn’t call out and stay home to get some rest.

Then I went to Ladies Who Lunch, where I had a wonderful time but could hardly eat any of the food in front of me. Don’t ask me what was wrong – I wasn’t exactly sick with anything I don’t think. Just tired to the point of wide-awakeness and that cavernous pit inside of your belly. That is not hunger, that is an intense need for rest.

Anyway, my stomach was still grumbly and upset with me on Friday when Nick and I set out to go running. I told Nick that I would head out to the trail with him but that I’d be walking.

He set his RunKeeper app and was off and away, leaving me and Muffin Dog to fend for ourselves.

The run we should have been making up was to run five minutes, walk five minutes, repeat four times.

I walked about 3/4 of a mile and waged an inner debate with myself.

Me #1: “Hey, how long is five minutes anyway?”

Me #2: “So long.”

Me #1: “No, it’s just five minutes. You can put up with anything for five minutes.”

Me #2: “Remember how sick we are?”

Me #1: “Try to run five minutes. If you can’t even do that – then great – we already knew you were sick.”

Me #2: “I am sick.”

Me #1: “Yes, but if you can do the five minutes…”

Me #2: “Then I can do the other five minutes too”

Me #1: “Exactly.”

So off I set with my multiple personalities and guess what? I ran the five minutes! And then I walked the five minutes, ran five more minutes, walked again, ran five more, walked again and ran five more.

Wanna know something? I had an excellent run. Really. That run was the best I did out of all three runs I had last week.

And I almost didn’t do it.

The thing is, the only one who really knows our limits – is us.

Nick can’t tell me “ah come on, you can do it.” That’s something I have to know for myself. He doesn’t know if I’m sick and can’t do anything – he might see that I don’t feel good, or hear me complain. But he doesn’t know what I am capable of in that moment.

And the crazy part: sometimes, we don’t even know our limits – until we fight them.

The difference between being sick and needing to take a break is a difference that only we can make for ourselves.

I’m not saying be stupid and ignore your body. There are times when we really do need to skip a workout or shift our intensity. The day before was in fact a necessary
missed workout. I’m saying listen to it…but make sure you listen to your body and not your head which is forever going to have excuses and ways out. It would have been easy to drag my day of sickness into an excuse that lasted well throughout the weekend.

And this is true far beyond running.

“I can’t do that…”

Sometimes we can’t. Sometimes we are busy and need to say no. Sometimes we need to mentally prepare. Sometimes we just aren’t capable of doing everything. I can’t is ok sometimes.

It’s when I can’t becomes “well I couldn’t a week ago so that must still be true today.”

Is it real or is it just a manufactured excuse?

Again, only we can know for ourselves and we have to fight what we knew to be true yesterday in order to keep pressing through our limitations.

***Turkey Trotters: please put your goals for the week in the comments section below.

Comments

  1. Michaela says:

    this is scary good. it is exactly what i needed to hear this morning.

  2. Stephanie says:

    Last week I set my goal at 8 thinking I would go a little high to push myself and I did 7 so again this week I will try for 8 and last week each time I ran I did go further each time. As for the snow it is supposed to start here this week which is a little early but I am not ready for it yet either. It is fun to play in but I dont want a long winter

  3. Robert says:

    Your point that we often use excuses when we don’t need to in making physical exercise and in all areas of our lives is so true. We can almost always do more than we think we can.

    A problem that I also see is not having enough self-knowledge of my present status or sense so I do not take on physical exercise that is beyond my current capability. The sense part is usually pretty obvious to me. If I let my ego rule and say I’m going on a 20 mile run, I know I’m being nonsensical and need to get a grip on myself. The self-knowledge of my present status is the tricky area for me. I know I can put in the time – and often the distance, but I am not as confident about knowing the consequences of doing so on any given day.

    For example, I have just put in two personal best workout weeks in a row. I feel fine except for a small soreness in the ball of my right foot. I could push it hard and put in a 3rd straight week. A problem is that I am driving from Seattle to Utah on Thursday. That move includes an altitude and a weather change and I know from past experience that my body takes time to adjust to each. Once I get there, I want to be able to perform non-physical activities at peak levels.

    For me, that suggests that I should take this week relatively safely and I plan to do so. I’ll ride the stationary bike but, at this point, I’m not committing to any mileage on it or on the road.

    No matter what I do this week, if I just finish the Turkey Trot, I will have performed the best Turkey Trot of my life! As we all know, it is me that is competing against me and I choose to run all the races set before me.

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